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Nokia X3 Flash Fiction Mini Contest Part II: Romantic Comedy

RULES

1. The deadline for ROMANTIC COMEDY flash fiction is at 11:59PM of Friday and the third will end 11:59PM of Sunday.

2. The contest is FLASH FICTION. If you don’t know what it is, this is the type of creative fiction which you can do with as little words as possible. The limit is 144 characters (including the space and periods, commas, etc) so if your limit is essentially one Tweet. Leave the entries in my comments section.

Example: Perhaps the most famous is the work by Hemmingway which goes something like: For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn.. English / Filipino / Taglish entries are OK. Avoid abbreviations.

3. The theme:

ROMANTIC COMEDY Thursday – Friday 11:59PM

Clock is based on the timestamp of the comments.

4. I’m choosing the winner. If there are any discrepancies with the rules whatsoever, I’ll have final say with the rules after considering the comments from readers. Winners wil be announced a couple of hours after each mini contest ends, also announcing the beginning of the new series.

5. This contest is open to everyone from the Philippines. if you live outside MLA, we will have to ship the prize to you courtesy of Nokia. They will take care of it. If you won once, you can’t win again. But you can submit as many entries as you wish (you can even combine them if you want). Entries that are heavily offensive / done in bad taste / pornographic won’t be counted. PG-13 allowed.

6. If you submitted your entry in the previous post, don’t worry I am keeping track of them, but please for new entries, submit in the comments section below this post.

By Jayvee Fernandez

Jayvee Fernandez is a tech enthusiast and sitting Techbology Editor for The Philippine STAR.

He is also an EAN certified SCUBA Diver and underwater photographer based in Metro Manila, Philippines. His photos and videos have appeared in various international and local publications including Random House Germany, Discovery Channel Canada, and CNN.

357 replies on “Nokia X3 Flash Fiction Mini Contest Part II: Romantic Comedy”

haha… thanks for the special mention Sir Jayvee… 😀

Thought it was scary. But yeah, it’s hilarious. Wahahaha…

Hmmmm… Time to think for the next category…

“Bangin ka ba? Kasi nahuhulog na ako sayo…”

Haha.. kanta po yan.. mag-iisip pa ako… Congrats sa winner!

Jayvee opened his cupped hand, showed it to a lady and said, “It’s my breath from when you took it away.” 😀

BOY: Asan ka kagabi?

GIRL: Dito lang sa bahay, natutulog.

BOY: Kaya pala.

GIRL: Oh bakit??

BOY: Wala ka kasi sa panaginip ko e.

When the Prince you stood in front of a mirror and show 11 horses, he would see 12.
‘The Princess notices it’

If a fat man puts you in a bag at night,
don’t worry I told Santa I wanted you
for Christmas

A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 12 fake, real and he says to her ” If the roses won’t die, I’ll stop loving you”

The girl’s left leg is Thanksgiving, and the right leg is Christmas,
The boy visits between the holidays.

Ang lalake ay mabait. Tinuring ang babae na parang asawa.
Nang maging masama. Tinuring ang babae na parang lalake.

The boy had no other options in order to live. I want to live please I C U or U C ME(the boy said to the girl)

The boy killed himself for his girlfriend because his tired seeing her dying.
‘Actually his girlfriend was just joking’

to correct previously posted:

“you’re the smartphone of my eyes, keypad of my fingers and promise to be your Nokia forever”

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart boss + smart employee =profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

TWEETED: @MyFerdie I love you, but I have to leave you. You’re like a Tweet. You have no more than 140 thousand pesos in your bank account.

Often in silence when you are not around I sit quietly, cherishing the memories abound,I often think how life would be without You.

Girlfriend:Ayaw ko na! I’ll return to you all the things you’ve given me!

Boyfriend:Okay then, let’s start with the kisses! (yan ang hirit:-D)

“forget the past that made you cry and focus on your present that completes your life.”

A man falls inlove through his eyes, while a woman falls inlove through her ears.

Destiny decides who you meet in life but it is your heart that decides who gets to stay forever

They say: “LOVE will keep us alive.”

but why are some people committing suicide?

Maybe the truth is:
“Too much LOVE will kill you.”

It’s not the effort that makes the girl smile.

It’s the willingness of the guy to do those crazy efforts just to make her feel special. 🙂

have you ever found the one.
the one who makes you feel complete?
Only to lose them forever
and watch them happy with someone else

Nakikita ko ang yong mukha sa aking mga panaginip;
Kaya’t lagi akong binabangungot sa aking idlip.

Parang langit ang yong ngiti, ang yong mga labi, ang yong mukha, ang yong mga mata. Damn, Galing kong mambola!

Mabait, matalino, magalang, mapagmahal, mapagpatawad. lahat na ay na sayo; kung maitatago mulang sana mukha mo.

Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy’s car. They marry. Boy misses girl and his car. Boy gets a dog.

lalake: Magdala ka ng salbabida.
babae: Bakit? Maliligo ba tayo?
lalake: Hindi, baka malunod ka sa pagmamahal ko.

Groom never imagined that he would meet his ex-lover in his own wedding. Ex-lover assures him, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell my daughter.”

“Alam mo ba na pwede kitang idemanda ng trespassing? Kasi basta-basta ka na lang pumapasok sa isip ko!”:)

boy:laro naman tau
girl:ano namang laro?
boy:kahit ano basta wag lang taguan
girl:bakit naman?
boy:bc0z a girl lyk u is impossible to find

A Sweet fight
gf: ayoko na talaga! dadalhin ko na lahat ng sakin.hindi na ko babalik!

bf: hoy! babae! may nakalimutan ka!

gf: ano?

bf: AKO!

girl:hey sasama ka ba mamaya?
boy:ay hindi ako pwede eh
girl:bakit naman.ano dahilan?
boy:magreresearch pa kasi ako kung pano ka magiging akin.

Boy: Uupo ako sa harap mo.

Girl: tapos?

Boy: Titingnan mo ko at titingnan din kita

Girl: Bkt?

Boy: Para may pagtingin tayo sa isat-isa.

mraming klase ng view…

front view..
back view..
side view..
top view..

pero sa dnami dmi ng view..
ang paborito ko ay…

I LOVE VIEW 🙂

boy:call her miss,nkalimutan ko name mo.
can i just call you MINE?

girl:no,im sorry!datz not my name.
im YOURS!

Parang puro galing lahat sa sms, mga forwarded messages. Madami ako nun but I wont post it here, di naman akin yun.

I’ve always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that I met you, I changed my mind.

When we’re together, you’ve always told me that you would die for me. Now that we;re no longer together, how about keeping your promise?!

Watched Naruto. Bought a guitar. Ate fishballs. Went to a car show… with my wife with me – and I am happier!

Boy’s 1st day at work
Boy meets girl inside an elevator
Boy flirts with Girl
Girl turns out to be boy’s boss

steve’s beautiful fiancee suddenly turns into a 70 year old man on the day of their wedding. The only way to turn her back was true loves’ kiss

Ana and Jim had recently split up. Ana tried to look for love online. She then fell in love with a guy named Chatter76 who turns out to be Jim.

Amo 1: Inday ano gamit mo sa katawan? Ang kinis mo kasi eh.
Amo 2: Siguro gumagamit ka ng papaya…
Ama 1: Baka naman kalamansi?
Inday: NO! …. ONLY BELO TOUCHES MY SKIN, WHO TOUCHES YOURS?
Amo 1 and 2:(tumbling)

“I offered eternal servitude, remember. I’m your slave for life.”
— Jacob Black

A man’s proposing to his girl put the ring in a cake, the girl ate the cake and didn’t notice the ring. She said the almond nuts are so yummy!

There is only one thing I want to speed up, and the rest can wait forever… but for that, it’s true, your impatient human hormones are my most powerful ally at this point.
-Edward Cullen, Eclipse

Edward Cullen: (to Jacob) If we weren’t natural enemies, and you weren’t trying to steal my reason for existing, I might like you.

B:Flowers for you and chocolates too! Kasi mahal kita.
G:(smiles sweetly) Thank you!
B:Hayaan mo, bukas diamante naman nanakawin ko. =)

A girl was drowned in a pool, when a man came and threw a life vest. She believe he was a Knight in shining armor until “That’s P15/hour” ok!

GIRL: Miss mo ba ako?

BOY: Sa ngayon “miss” palang kita, sa susunod “misis” na kita.

Girl: Gusto kong ikasal sa malaking simbahan at may magandang reception. Ikaw, saan mo gusto?

Boy: Sa tabi mo.

Once upon a time:

Boy: Pupu ka ba?

Girl: Hindi ah! Bakit?

Boy: Kasi hindi kita kayang paglaruan eh.
🙂

Once upon a time:

BOY: Sana wrinkles na lang kita.

GIRL: Bakit naman?

BOY: Para kasama kita hanggang sa pagtanda ko. 🙂

boy: hindi kaba napapagud?
girl: hindi,bakit?
boy: kanina kapa kasi tumatakbo sa isipan ko.

sana isda ka at tubig ako para sa ayaw at gusto mo hindi ka mabubuhay ng wala ako.

At a party, the Prince was smitten by a lady disguised as a gypsy. They made out. The next day, the jester was executed. He was the gypsy.

The most sensitive part you can touch on a woman that will drive her crazy.Her heart.(hmm.mga green minded jan.ehe)

Ana sliced the cake and found a ring. She rushed to Jim’s side & hugged him. He hugged her back & mouthed at the waiter,”Wrong girlfriend!”

boy: parol kba?

girl: bkt?

boy: kse all these years ikaw pa rin ang nksabit sa puso ko..

boy: candy cane ka ba?

girl: bakit naman?

boy: kasi pag nakikita kita, i always want to lick you

boy: anong gagawin mo this christmas?

girl: wala naman. party lng. ikaw?

boy: ganun pa rin.
mamahalin ka

Groom was dismayed to meet his ex-lover at his own wedding. The bride’s father said to him: “Anna understands. On weekends, you’re mine.”

Man and woman got married. A year after, they divorced. Then, woman gave birth and sued man for alimony. Man had a stroke.

Know what? I love my bf even though he refuses to commit to a hamper and putting down the toilet seat and lid at least for once in my life.

lifeis.oceanbliss at gmail dot com

“Our love will last forever, in this life and beyond,” boy and girl swore to each other. The next day, they broke up.

Ana sliced the cake and found a ring. She rushed to Jim’s side & hugged him. He hugged her back & mouthed at the waiter,”Wrong girlfriend!”

B:Excuse me can I borrow a phone, it is an emergency?
G:Yea sure whats wrong?
B:My mom told me to give her a call the first time I fell in love.

You: You look like my second wife!
Other: How many times have you been married?
You: Once!

I wish I were a tear so I could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

When God made you he had to have broken the mold because I have never seen anything as beautiful as you.

Can i take your picture??
coz i want to show Santa exactly what i want for Christmas!!

Yesterday ended my PMS. Today I miss cuddling with him. Tomorrow starts my menopause. Whoever said love is endless, doesn’t study Biology.

lifeis.oceanbliss at gmail dot com

Para kang “LUPANG HINIRANG”. Napapatigil kasi ako pag narinig kita. At hindi lang yun! Napapahawak pa ako sa puso ko!

She tried to slap me, slipped, and hit her head. When she came to, she said she wanted to have my baby. I should have tried to catch her.

Girl asked boy,”how much do you love me?” boy replied,”its like a phone… I love you X 3 (times three) – love love love much!” 🙂

I was in McDo Katipunan.
He was in McDo Batangas.
Phones at hand.
A pair of Cheeseburgers and Caramel Sundaes.

Wag kang maniwala sa mga sabi-sabi mahal. I never left you. Uulitin ko. Hindi kita KINALIWA!

Eh paano?! Ang napansin ko ay hindi ang kanyang magandang kutis o mga mata…masakit mang isipin, ang una kong napansin ay ang kanyang tinga!

I know that you want to be seated at that table when we date. I bought it so that we don’t have to go back to that fancy restaurant anymore.

LOST AND FOUND: 43 year old male high school crush who lost his memory. I find him still sexy so I brought him home. Get him back tomorrow.

Labs na labs parin kita kahit bungi bungi kana, para sakin ikaw ang pinakapoging papa, o ka’y sarap isiping kasama kang tumanda

kung ikaw ang makakalaban ko sa karera..

pede bang maglakad na lang tayo?

bakit pa ko tatakbo, e kasama ko na premyo ko?! 🙂

Tombstone text written by the departed’s wife: HEAR LAYS A MEN DEAD AFTER DONATING THE BREIN TO HER BELOBED WIFE HU SUFERD BREIN TUMORS.

Guy1: Pare, tanda mo na la ka paring GF. Wala kabang napupusuan?
Gu2y: Pare, manhid ka lng…manhid ka lng.

Guwapo + Maganda = Perfect Couple
Guwapo + Panget = True Love
Panget + Maganda = Galing Dumiskarte
Panget + Panget = SUKOB!

GF: Honey, do you think I’m pretty or ugly?
BF: For me, you’re PRETTY UGLY. Love is blind though. =)

Husband (Dying): I love you and I’m sorry I’ve cheated you.
Wife: I know. That’s why I poisoned you.

Happy 50th anniversary dear. Here’s to years of regular fighting and drunken living; looking forward to more fights and wines. Cheers!

ROMANTIC COMEDY #1: He likes men. She likes women. A match made in heaven.

ROMANTIC COMEDY #2: They had a baby. They got married. They fell in love.

ROMANTIC COMEDY #3: He’s 6’2″. She’s 5’2″. Horizontally, it doesn’t really count.

What men meant:
-Can I help with dinner? (Food isn’t ready yet?)
-That’s interesting, dear. (Still talking?)
-Oh! How bad my memory is! (I forgot)

ROMANTIC COMEDY #4: He’s an obituary writer. She writes epitaphs. A match made in heaven. Or hell.

Wife. Crossword help cry. “8-letter word for ‘tiresome sameness’”.
Husband. Answer. “Monogamy”. Wink Wink.

Husband whispered lovingly to his wife, “You’re a good investment. Before we married, my hands could reach around you. Now…”.

Two friends talking.
F1: Bakit ganun ang sakit sakit Tol? Iniwan niya lang ako.
F2: Bakit? Saan ba dapat kayo pupunta?

Kahit madaming tao sa mundo, kung mahal mo siya, di ka talaga maiinlove sa iba. Maliban na lang kung malandi ka.

“You have eyes like stars, lips like candies, cheeks like cherries and skin like butter.”
Wait, don’t smile. Imagine how you look like.

Ang taong gusto mo, parang ice cream. Matutunaw lang kapag tinitigan mo. Kaya kung ako sayo, dilaan mo na habang maaga pa.

B: Break na tayo!
G: (umiiyak) Bakit? Hindi mo na ba ako mahal?
B: Gaga. Break na tayo, kain tayo, nagugutom na ako eh! Syempre tayo pa! 🙂

Ang pag ibig ko sayo ay parang RUGBY..
Matagal matanggal.. At higit sa lahat, nakaka-HIGH :”>

BOY: Sana naging simbang gabi nalang ako…
GIRL: Bakit?
BOY: Para kahit papano ku-kumpletuhin mo ako.

What if my name is “YOURS”? How will I introduce myself to you? Should I say, hi, i’m Yours.

Anong sabi ng baboy na nililitson?
“Just gonna stand there and watch me burn, but that all right because I like the way it hurts”.

G: Aanhin mo yung hagdan?
B: Aakyat sana ako sayo ng ligaw
G: Yumuko ka na lang.
B: Bakit?
G: Pakipulot ung puso ko, nahulog na kasi sayo!

This is how to greet your ex on Christmas and New Year.
“Maligayang PAST-ko” at “May bagong ka-ON na ko”.

Girl: If I would give you a chance to kiss me, where would you want it to be?
Boy: Inside the CHURCH in front of JESUS.

Kahit gaano pa karami ang inumin kong ENERVON, kung hindi naman kita makikita, hindi ko rin maaabot ang “HAPPINESS” ko.

MATH GEEK Lovers exchange notes:
distribute x=3
3x+4x+5x+22+5+7x=?
3(3)+4(3)+5(3)+22+5+7(3)=
I L O V E U

Anong height mo? Pa’no ka nagkasya sa puso ko?

—-

Ang buhay ko ay parang seesaw. Pag wala ka, down ako.

—-

Sana naka-off ang ilaw, para tayo nalang mag-on.

—-

Album ka ba? Kasi single ako.

—-

#supercorny :p

I forgot your name. Can I call you mine?

—

Pustiso ka ba? – kasi I can’t smile without you

—

May butas ba yang puso mo? Natrap kasi ako, can’t find my way out.

—

Uy papicture tayo para ma-develop tayo!

—

Uy, question? Can you recommend a good banker where I can make a deposit? Coz I’m planning to save all my love for you.

@Sanctuarian06
ahmm dont worry hindi sila nanggagaya hindi lang nila alam na meron ng ganung entry, masyado madami yung entries to read kaya pabayaan mo na, siguro naman First Come First Serve ang isang rules d2

Why is your face all scratched ?
My girlfriend said it with flowers.
How romantic.
Not really, she hit me round the head with a bunch of thorny roses !

What happened to that couple who met in a revolving door ?
They’re still going round together !

My brother fell in love with his wife the second time he met her.
He didn’t know how rich she was the first time !

Why aren’t you going to marry David after all?
Well he said he’d die if I didn’t, so thought I’d wait and see!

You’re quite a catch! But don’t feel too bad -even good offers sometimes have a catch! 🙂

Wag kang matatakot
kung kulay pula
na yung dingding
at kisame mo
pagkagising mo..

Wala ka sa impyerno
kasi…

andito ka sa PUSO ko! 🙂

may nahalata ako sa crush ko..
sa totoo lang, cute naman siya at mabait pa,
kaso may kulang talaga sa kanya eh..

hmmmm.. AKO! 🙂

Kung
subject
ka sa
school,
gusto ko
ikaw ang
pinakamahirap…

..para sa’yo
lang ako
babagsak! 🙂

Now I know you love another and its hard for me to get over, even though we’re not together, my heart loves you.

At the first time I saw you, I was afraid to fall in love with you, but now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you.

Nawala ang ngiti ng lalake nang tuluyang natanggal ang damit pangkasal at nakita ang isang bagay na dapat ay wala sa isang babae…

Mayaman. Matalino. Galing sa magandang pamilya. At higit sa lahat, mabait at understanding. Tapos tatanggihan mo lang dahil mabaho ang paa?!

I’ve lost you and I’m regretting all I’ve done, but always remember that I’m with you all along.

patatawanin kita pag hindi ka masaya, bubuhatin kita pag nirayuma kana, o kay sarap isiping kasama kang tumanda.

Love at first sight. Second, third, fourth… Wait someone’s coming! Okay. Fifth, sixth….

Bar. Woman entered. Man noticed. Eyes met. Smiles exchanged. Held hands. Sweet nothings. Room. Passion burning. That would P5000, woman said.

Alam mo ba kung bakit tinalikuran ko ang dota para sayo? Kasi ang dota kaya kong paglaruan, pero ikaw hindi.

B: Idedelete na kita sa friendster!
G: Bakit naman?
B: Kasi ayaw ko ng friends lang tayo eh! 🙂

She fell right into the cake while I was having my afternoon tea. It was then I saw the only thing missing in the bland taste of my life.

Hold my hand he asked, “no, its sweaty!”. minutes later I grabbed his hand “even if your sweat will drown me this is all worth it.”

“why are you such a tomboy?! You act so manly!” Then I kissed the living daylights out of him to shut him up and the rest was magic.

B: Aabsent na ako sa lahat ng klase ko.
G: Bakit naman?
B: Para makapasok ako sa puso mo. 🙂

B: Hoy bukas sisingilin na kita ng renta ha!
G: Bakit naman?
B: Kasi matagal ka ng nakatira sa puso ko eh. 🙂

B: May kilala ka bang gumagawa ng relo?
G: Madami. Bakit?
B: May sira yata relo ko. Pag ikaw kasi kasama ko, humihinto ang oras ko. 🙂

B: Mabilis ka siguro sa mga puzzles no?
G: Medyo. Bakit?
B: Kasi kakasimula pa lang ng araw ko nabuo mo na. 🙂

Showgirl1 saw her boyfriend with showgirl2. An hour later: boyfriend had broken bones; showgirl 2 needed a cosmetic surgeon.

B: Kapag ako may tindahan, lahat ng tao bebentahan ko ng mura, sayo lang hindi.
G: Bakit naman?
B: Dahil sayo lang ako magmamahal. 🙂

Girl:Alam mo para kang bisyo.
Boy:(kilig) Dahl di mo ko maiwasan?
Girl:Di noh! Dahil sinisira mo buhay ko..!

Though you’re someone in this world that I’ll always choose to love, from now on you’re only someone that I used to love…from now on you’re only someone that I love to use!

Husband: When we’re old, I wish you would die ahead of me, ’cause if I die first, I can’t stand the thought of you being left alone and lonely.
Wife: That is so sweet! But I wish that you die first so I can spend your insurance and have a vacation!

Eve: Tell me one good reason why I should marry you!
Adam: There is no one else!

Man: If I give you all the riches in the world, would you marry me?
Woman: No. Unless you give yourself, too!

Sa totoo lang hindi ako naniniwala sa fate, pero nung dumating ka sa buhay ko nabago lahat ng pananaw ko.

Tucked under the sheets, guy & wife caresses each other, eyes filled with love & lust. Moment is building up. Suddenly, prrffftttt. Bed empty.

Patapon na ang buhay ko ngunit nagkaroon ako ng reason na magsimula ng panibago at ikaw yung reason na yun.

–A lady took a widower’s daughter. He mourns again. Whose body?
–The postman rings thrice. No letters. Blank stares.
–Snow white won’t wake up. Final curtain.
–I traveled to the future. No one’s there.
–The wedding bells stopped tolling. Rose petals, gone with the wind.
–A poor lad eloped with a rich girl. He finally came home. No house. Arson
–A Philosophy book. A broken rosary. Emmanuel’s stuffs.
— An extravagant wedding. Then, children at the couple’s doorsteps.
–A friar weeps at the sight of his daughter entering the convent.
–Dad’s illness. Mom’s indifference. Ted’s bruises.
–Epitaph: He served to the king. Gone in a landlord’s whim.
–For Printing: A 16-yrs old’s Curriculum vitae.

it’s not yet quarter to 12 🙂 goodluck

Current local time: 11:41:24 pm
Date: Sunday 16 January 2011
Time zone: PHT (Philippines Time)
Current time zone offset: +08:00 hours

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